Hyperventilating a Little

oh geez - comps are right around the corner, guys. like, monday and tuesday. i am SO NOT READY YET, and i am freaking out. i have successfully finished reading the two textbooks that one of my committee members assigned, and i have read maybe 25% of the huge stack of journal articles that various other committee members assigned. so for the next 5 days i will be doing nothing but reading and thinking and hoping like hell that i don't fail my comps. if i do i will look stupid, and they should kick me out of the ph.d. program. which they won't even if i do fail, but still.

i was talking to dr. v. about comps yesterday (i had to get his spare laptop to take the exam), and he's going to give me the questions one at a time so no one can say i went home and looked up stuff between days one and two of the exam. he doesn't have the questions from all my committee members yet, but he said that from those he has seen, they "will require a lot of thought, but they don't seem to be off topic. no one asked anything like, 'how do you do know that jesus christ exists?'" so yeah, i'm scared. and i told dr. v. that. he assured me that i will be fine. but i am still not so sure.