why is that you run out of words for the most important things in life? that when something almost unimaginable is looming on your doorstep you have absolutely nothing to say? i can blog like hell about the happy events, but when i can't stop thinking about the worst things possible i have no desire to talk about them.
see these posts from two years ago. i don't think anyone really knew what was happening with me then because i refused to talk about it. because talking about it makes it more real. that's where we are again. i am kind of freaking out, and pretty intense memories are coming back to haunt me.
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