most of you can tell that my life has been both busy and very stressful for the last week and a half, thus the lack of updates on what's been going on. things have returned to a somewhat normal state for me today, so i have a little time to let the world know what's been going on.
you can tell from my last couple of posts (not 'fuck you, biron!') that i've been a little sad, a little guilty, and a lot stressed out. well, chad and i went to philadelphia (obviously), and i surprised myself by having an amazing time, despite the cloud that's been hanging over my head lately. i felt really bad when we left wednesday morning, but when we arrived in philly i was able to sort of put things out of my mind. of course, i talked to my mom every day we were there (a couple times one day), and i felt a little better when we were able to get an earlier flight home on saturday, so we got into pensacola at 4:00 instead of 6:00. my granny's wake was saturday night, so chad and i went straight there after we picked up my car. the funeral was sunday afternoon in atmore, so we went home saturday night (i had no appropriate clothes with me, just jeans and t-shirts, which mom assured me would be ok for the wake) then drove back to atmore sunday.
sunday turned out to be a huge fiasco. the funeral went off as well as a funeral can, i guess. my mom was really upset, of course, and i'm kind of worried about her because she still seems to be taking all of this very hard. harder than any of her four siblings, particularly her three brothers. after the funeral, we were all going back over to my granny's house (where my uncles are staying because it's the only place with enough room for everyone, and there are things that need to be taken care of) for dinner. people do that, i guess. you know, have a reception after a funeral. i expected to go over there, people would bring food (which they did), we would eat and be sad and remember granny. we were in her house, after all.
that is not what happened. my family is so freakin' screwed up, i can't even believe it. they (meaning my uncles, cousins, and a couple of family friends) acted like whole thing was a huge party. my mom and i (and the rest of my immediate family) were appalled. who does that? seriously. they made a freakin bonfire and bought cases upon cases of beer. my aunt had sent a couple of my teenage cousins out to by ice so we would have enough for everyone for dinner, and when they returned one of my uncles proceeded to pour the ice over the beer, which they'd decided to store in 5-gallon buckets. it was insane, guys, and completely inappropriate. we were absolutely shocked at what was going on, and chad and i took off right after we ate, because i couldn't stand to look at what was going on around me. my aunt jo (my mom's sister) didn't come over there because she wasn't feeling well. shortly after chad and i left, my mom and sister went over to see jo for a while and left the rest of them to their disgusting party. my brother left around the same time chad and i did.
my mom is very stressed right now, not to mention still grieving. my uncle roger is the executor of my granny's will, and he's acting like he's just going to take over the house and all of the land and move right in, which is completely unfair to everyone. my mom's and my aunt jo's names are on all of my granny's bank accounts, and no one but them can take the money out of her checking and savings accounts and her 4 CDs. my uncles keep trying to get them to take the money out right now and divide it up (which is fair), but my mom doesn't want to do that until she knows that the property will be dealt with fairly as well. really, the only fair thing to do is sell the place (for which they can get at least $450,000) and divide the money among the 5 of them. but my uncles are acting like they don't want to do that, and roger is already talking about just moving in and giving the trailer they live in now in central florida to his oldest son. so right now roger and his wife elaine are basically living in my granny's house and expecting my mom to pay all the bills out of granny's accounts. i told mom last night that she needs to call all the utility companies and have everything cut off immediately. then if roger wants to turn everything back on, it will be in his name. they need to do that anyway, no matter what the plans are.
i think mom and jo are going to talk to a lawyer because everything is so screwed up. they are the beneficiaries on granny's life insurance, and my uncles are saying that they have to split that up, too. i told mom not to give them a dime of it because life insurance is not part of the estate, and only the beneficiaries have a claim to it. i hope she does talk to a lawyer today, or she's going to get royally screwed over by her brothers in all of this, particularly if roger thinks he's just going to keep the house and all of the land (about 180 acres or so).
ok. time to stop ranting and do some lab work. i'll try to write a post about the philly trip soon.
Wishing for Spring
1 day ago