the sometimes senseless ravings (and the occassional rant) of an aspiring marine ecologist who may enjoy killing things a little too much

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Gay Marriage Kills Babies!

or something. i have to have a nice rant about this or i'm going to explode. or implode. or something. i am sick to death of coming home to messages on my answering machine from a 'concerned mother of three' wanting to put a stop to gay marriage. and i'm sick of answering my phone and hearing this same recorded message OVER and OVER again. this barrage of calls was apparently sparked by the legalization of gay marriage in massachusetts, and somebody feels the overwhelming urge to repeatedly call THE WHOLE WORLD begging for someone to help fight gay marriage.

why the hell do i care if gay people get married? huh? can anyone think of one good reason? do gay people harm our children? i don't think so. and how does their getting married hurt me? IT DOESN'T! someone alert the masses! gay people aren't hurting anyone! let 'em get married if they want! 'cause guess what? it's none of our damn business! and you know what i've found? married people without kids pay more taxes than singles. it's true. so gay people getting married (provided that they don't adopt kids, which just for the record, i don't have a problem with) would actually create more tax revenue! well, income tax revenue anyway.

oh, and i'm pretty damn far away from massachusetts. i doubt that folks here in the bible belt will ever allow the legalization of gay marriage in this part of the world. i mean, people here wouldn't even vote 'yes' on removing racist language from the state constitution, but there was all kinds of support for an amendment banning gay marriage. jesus christ, people, what the hell is wrong with you?

perhaps you've noticed this, but the 30 or so calls i've recieved from these people over the last month are really STARTING TO ANNOY ME. now they're calling twice a day. at least. yesterday i was home for lunch (technically, but i spent half an hour on the phone ordering lab stuff), and the stupid anti-gay people called. of course, i've heard their speil a hundred times, so i hung up. then when i got home last night, there was ANOTHER message!

after about the tenth message on my machine, i decided i would actually call the number they left (you know, 'press 1 for more information or call 1-877-266-6277' - and that IS their actual phone number, btw, in case anyone feels that they MUST call and bitch at these morons on my behalf) and let them know how much i DO NOT CARE if gay people get married and how much their repeated calls were pissing me off. i also mentioned that i am registered with the national DO NOT CALL list, (so why the hell do they keep calling?), after which the nice fellow i chatted with (read: bitched at kind of a lot) said that he was adding me to THEIR do not call list. after which the annoying calls ceased for approximately three days. and now they are back IN FORCE, with their multiple calls per day. i seriously need to get caller ID on my land line. 'cause i am SERIOUSLY sick of losing precious minutes of my life (minutes i can never get back, mind you) listening to this crap. or deleting it from my answering machine.

chad has suggested that i call them up and try another tactic. i should tell them they're all going to hell for judging the poor gay people (not that i pity gay people either, they're just people like everyone else). the concerned mother seems to want to avoid hell at all costs (though judging and meddling don't seem to bother her or the multitudes she's roped into aiding her on the quest to end gay marriage once and for all (mwahahaha!)). you know, 'cause the message also includes some bit to the effect of god defining marriage as a union of one man and one woman (so sorry to all the polygamist mormons of yesteryear and all those ancient egyptians and their concubines, who certainly all went STRAIGHT TO HELL, regardless of whatever good natures they possessed and good deeds they performed and good lives they led, along with all the ancient greeks and romans and native americans and countless tribal people with their multiple gods. too bad, you're all screwed).

whew. it's nice to have that off my chest. so, one last point, just for the record - i really, truly, honestly, deeply believe that being gay does NOT make one a bad person. i know plenty of great, kind, wonderful people who are gay. people to whom i will one day occassionally entrust the care of my children (not that i'm going to have any of THOSE anytime soon, but one day i would like a kid. everybody loves babies). gay people don't kill babies (no more than straight people kill babies, anyway). they just want to be happy. what's wrong with that?

4 comments:

Deva said...

I agree with you on every point!! I personally would be pissed too.k

Vanessa Mae said...

I also do not see a problem with gay marriage. There isn't enough romance any more in this world and who are we to get in the way of true love, huh? Even if it's between two people of the same gender.

But I'm truly sorry to say that those people ARE allowed to call you because they are exempt from the National No Call List because they are political organizations, not "telemarketers" trying to generate sales. I learned about this during my co-op time ... we marketers had to know what our boundaries are for making calls to customers. Political organizations, charities, and marketers of businesses who have already established a business relationship with the customer are allowed to make calls even if you're on the No Call List. While you did ask them to put you on their personal no call list, the Federal Trade Commission won't really enforce it.

We'll have to find some other way to make their lives a living hell ;-).

Holly said...

As a Canadian, and therefore a citizen of a vile, Satanic place that actually now allows people in love to put their marriage into writing, I can honestly say that there have been no more baby killings or wrath-of-heaven stuff here than before the law passed.

And as someone who just got married, I can only say "awwwwwww" to ANYONE who takes that plunge.

Anonymous said...

This may be an old post, but I just "met" this organization today. They are actually a christian phone services company (United American Technologies) which operates under the guise of various non-profit organizations, apparently to skirt the FTC do not call regulations. I have done some research on this company and disgusted with their tactics.

Simply Google their number for pages of results: 1-877-266-6277.

I would suggest you file a complaint with the FTC as I did. For more information: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_American_Technologies

Tammy